I’m going on week 3 of being too goddamn sick to really drink. That hasn’t stopped me from drinking, just from enjoying it very much.
That being said, I have enjoyed a few brews. Why don’t we fucking get into that shit, as maybe talking about the beer that I can’t fucking drink will calm my goddamn nerves a bit. Fucking pollen. Fucking sinuses. Fuck.
This shit's good. Like internal bleeding.
OK, this shit here is fucking RJ Rockers Black Perle. This is a local brewery stepping up their game and taking shit to the next fucking level. This beer, while called a “dark IPA,” certainly tasted like a fucking porter if I’ve ever had one. Then again these pills I’m on are making me forget what the fuck a porter tastes like. Probably like that fucking mucus in the back of my throat right now. I mean, that’s what it would fucking taste like if I could drink. Goddamn it.
Regardless, Black Perle is a tasty concoction and should be consumed in mass quantities if found. That is, if you can get the goddamn cap off. Those dipped caps are a pain in the ass even if they look cool. It’s like childproofing. Think about the fucking children!
If you like fucking boys, you'll love the fucking Boy King...
This one came straight from a growler, so there’s no fancy-pants bottle for you fuckers to see. Coast Boy King hardly needs an introduction, but here goes – This is the beer that put hair on your mom’s tits. Utterly hopped to perfection, this beer smells like pussy, but in a good way – floral and sweet, but a little bitter, wet and just a bit alcoholic. It tastes like the fucking cure for cancer, and for all I know, it may be. So much goddamn hop flavor with a tinge of bitter. Another beer for the breakfast table. I give this beer five fucking fucks!
